My big fat classy non-glittery memories of how gypsies used to be

For the past week I've had the cold, no fever but feeling like shit nonetheless. So after work I've arrived home, fed the cat and gone to bed exhausted. My eyes still worked, so obviously I watched a ton of TV.

On Saturday there was a marathon of "My big fat gypsy wedding". See the link for the English version HERE.

Then please see this link HERE  from the movie Snatch, which also includes a nice piece of the gypsy life.

Now tell me what the hell's happened in here??? Since when have gypsies gone glitter?

When I was little, we had gypsies in my school. The only thing particular about them was that they were a little bit of rascals, the girls had superlong dark hair and wore skirts, and the boys were always equally nicely dressed (wearing trousers, not skirts). They never wore anything that showed off too much skin, but instead they were always very classy when it came to clothing. Oh, and they all had leather jackets, and their moms had these humongous black dresses with white lace on them. We used to say that you could hide a whole caravan under there. I assume the gypsy kids had some traditions and rules I knew nothing about, but I remember that they were very respectful towards their elders. I thought that was kinda nice.

So when I look at these people appearing on the show My big fat gypsy wedding, I feel a little confused.

For one, they're always getting married. Or getting pregnant and having a baby shower. Or having their first communion. Or a birthday. It's all one big party. 

Secondly, the ultimate rule of dressing up is to show off as much ass  and tits as possible. Even at your wedding, or even if you're 10 years old and going to the church for that famous first communion.

Thirdly, whatever the event, the dress has to be huge and have at least 21 petticoats. Ok, that's something that the Finnish gypsies had as well, but they did it in a classy way, not by having these dresses that you can only wear in one room because the door isn't wide enough for you to get out.

Fourthly, everything has to glitter, and have butterflies on it, and glow in various neon colors. This one girl on the show who actually wasn't a gypsy but was marrying one, and therefore had to REALLY impress the future in laws,  had lighting installed in her wedding dress. Lighting, folks, as in battery operated leds all over the pink wedding dress (yes pink, because white would just be boring). Oh, and don't forget the 2 foot tiara standing on her forehead. 

Fifthly (can you say fifthly, is it a real word??), the little girls start to get spray tans when they're 12. That, and getting their nails done, and learning how to dance like a pole dancer. There was this cute little girl with freckles getting ready for her first communion. The mom took her to get a spray tan. She was asked what's the proper age when a girl should start getting spray tans, and she said twelve. "And how old are you dear?" "Twelve" "And why do you think twelve is the right age?" "Because when you're two or three years old, you're still little. But when you're twelve you're all grown up and should get a spray tan". While yes, I think she nailed that answer.

Sixthly, the guys are just "there", they don't really do anything. They go to work if they got one, and if not, they go get in trouble.

Now, I'm not saying that all gypsies are like this, I'm just saying that this is how they come off when watching the TV show. So, if the reality is something different, and the show's made up and full of lies, go blame the network.

To me, gypsies have always been as I knew them from my childhood. One of them was in my class when I was in high school. She was a nice girl, apart from being a little hyperactive, never doing her home work, or bringing her books to school in general. Still, I never saw her as something completely different from me, just a free and somewhat troubled spirit if you will. 

So what the hell happened here? When did gypsies become glittery? Showing off your status by having a big skirt or quality leather jacket has always been a part of the culture, I think, but when did it change from classy to trashy? Are there any of the old traditional gypsies out there? If so, how are they, what do they do, where do they live and do they ride ponies?

Help.