So there, I've said it. I hate mustaches. I think the Movember-cause is important per sè, but couldn't we raise awareness of dude-cancer in some other way? They're constantly playing with their bollocks anyway, so they might as well test them for lumps while they're at it. Am I right?
Anyway, Movember as a cause = good. Movember as having to look at pathetic excuses for a mustache for a month = bad.
I don't know where this hatred for mustache comes from. Maybe it's the fact that in Finland guys usually don't have mustaches or beards, and therefore I'm not used to them (they have little hair in general, so it's not like they don't want to have facial hair, they're not ABLE to have facial hair). The weird thing is that I don't hate beards. Beards are cool, as long as they're cared for and not too long. That's probably because Santa has one, and it's nice and white and soft and Mrs. Clause takes extra good care of it with some honey-based conditioner she made herself during the boring summer months.
Maybe mustache to me spells out "porn actor", as in John Holmes for example. A guy with a mustache is kinky, not to be trusted and he's hiding gonorrhea and herpes under that hair. Obviously these are just impressions of mine, god knows where they come from. It's not like I watch porn day and night, or that I think that porn actors automatically have gonorrhea.
I don't hate hair in general on guys either. You got chest hair? Fine. You got back hair, I can deal with that. You got hair long enough on your back to make a pair of wings and fly? Ok, that's a bit gross but still better than a mustache. Got leg hair? Not a problem. Got ass hair? Well, obviously you do, so that's ok too. Just don't have a mustache and I'm ok.
The thing is that if I had the chance to be a guy for a day, there would be two things that I'd look forward to. Seeing how the "male member" works (e.g. peeing and all that stuff well you know) and having facial hair. I'll probably never be able to have a nice beard (unless I get some weird menopausal disorders and all my hair suddenly grows only in one place: under my nose) so I'd really be interested in finding out what it's like. How uncomfortable it is (or not?), does the food get stuck in it and how, do you comb it or brush it, what's it like to kiss someone with that thing in the middle etc. Fascinating stuff indeed.
Here in Italy lots of guys have facial hair. And a lot of them choose to have a mustache. And they are convinced they look awesome in it. That's probably because for some in-explainable reason people here think having a mustache is da bomb. I would bet that in general people's feelings towards mustaches are different here than in Finland. If you're a university student and looking for a subject for your thesis, here's one: what causes a population to prefer facial hair, or hate it. You're welcome little university student, this one was a freebee. Next time I'll charge for my precious ideas.
The thing is, I could kinda get the idea behind a mustache if it was a "real" mustache, as in lots of hair, all of them in order. But the thing is that when people who usually don't have a mustache start to grow one, the result is 5 two inch long hairs on your upper lip, 3 of them crossed and 2 of them a little father away doing their own thing. That's not a mustache, that's 5 hairs in a row. And not even in a row seeing that 2 of them have gone awol. If you can't grow a nice mustache, let it go, even if it's Movember. You can check your balls without facial hair as well.Happy hair-free December to everyone!
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