Are you being diplomatic, or are you just an ass??

This was the headline of a posting I've been writing for two weeks now. I've cancelled it, re-wrote it, thought about it, and made a million little changes to it. It has to do with work and the relationship between you and the client. I haven't published it, because I've hesitated to talk about work here in my blog, even though I'm not criticizing my work place in particular but rather the way of working in general here in Italy. And I'm sure this applies also to other countries, but since I can only write about what I know, hear and see, well folks I'm stuck with that.

I'm not going to publish my re-written posting today either. But I will say this though.

In the beginning of my work career I was taught that honesty is the best policy. Telling the truth to the client creates a relationship of trust and respect. Honesty should also be the back bone of the whole company. Telling the truth means that no matter who the client happens to talk to in your organization, he'll get the same information from everybody, because everything's out in the open and everybody knows the same things. Telling the truth means that you don't ever have to remember what you said to someone, because you know you've told the truth instead of something you made up and can't remember anymore. Your back is always covered because of your honesty. When you make a mistake, say you've made a mistake, and try to fix it instead of covering it up. Tell the customer not only the good news but also the bad news, because having the correct information will help both you and him to resolve the situation. If something's simply not possible to do, say that it's not possible instead of making empty promises in order to please a customer. Be polite, firm and clear in your responses, so that both you and your client feel secure and that everything's understood by both parties. Oh, and smile when you're on the phone and slip in a joke or two every now and then, because it'll brighten up both of your working day.

This approach just doesn't work here. You can't be truthful, you need to be diplomatic. Telling the truth and nothing but the truth is cold and rude. It's rude even if you smile while telling it, because then you just come off as someone who's not taking matters seriously. Being diplomatic and saying things that are not true but almost true is a game played by all parties involved, and it's impolite not to play along. The customer expects you to cushion the blow by saying something that sounds nicer than the actual truth, because the reality is a bitch. They key is not to say what's right, but to say things that the customer wants to hear at that very moment. And he'll do the same with you. And you can both go on living in your little bubble of "nice". But only until the bubble breaks, then you're the one left cleaning the mess.

Living in a foreign country means compromising on a lot of issues and leaning new ways of thinking and doing. But sometimes you should also stop and think if the adjustments you're making in order to fit in better are forcing you to compromise your own values. Your roots, your sense of right and wrong, the things your mom taught you. You should think about when to stick to your guns, and when to let go, and when to find a compromise between the two.

Well, that was awfully serious. Considering that it's Friday, I'd like to conclude this week with something nice. Something cuddly. Something that'll make you forget all about the hardships of the past 5 days.

Yesterday evening me and my cat ate some yogurt. It was really good. I spent the rest of the evening watching a film. She spent the rest of the evening playing, running around and farting a little.

Have a great weekend everybody!

"say what now?"