Watch your back

Something really weird happened yesterday. Since I was 9 my mom has always told me that I should never feel guilty about buying new underwear or socks. "You'll always need them", said mom. So after having decided not to buy anything even though there are huge sales out there, I decided to go ahead anyway and buy some underwear.

I went to the local underwear store, and picked out a new bra and new panties. Since I know perfectly what my size is in that store, I didn't bother trying them on, I just picked out a nice bra from the discount pile and a pair of panties to go with them, went to pay and headed home. It was only this morning that I realized what I had bought.

The bra was just fine. The panties not. And I SWEAR I didn't buy these on purpose. I'm not that kind of a girl.

Basically what you have is a pair of normal panties, with a little "hatch" in the back. Like a little door that you can open should your ass get too sweaty. It's held up by these little buttons. I drew you a picture to explain the situation better.

1. normal front 2. normal back 3. creepy back with a "hatch"

Now, is this the female version of the hole that guys have on the front of their undies for peeing, or what the hell are we talking about here? I know what you're all thinking, because that was my first thought too, but for christ's sake shouldn't those kinds of panties be sold in a whole other kind of a store??!! Or have I just misunderstood how to use these panties? If there's some logical explanation to this weird pantie-design, please let me know, I'm dying to know.

One thing's for sure, I'm not using them. And I'm not taking them back to the store either, that would be too embarrassing. I guess I'll just use them for cleaning the house or something.

What have we learned today people? Always ALWAYS try on the underwear at the store. Otherwise you might end up with "the hatch" and a sales woman who snickers every time she passes you on the street.