Hello, I'm single, again.

So what's the deal with putting your relationship status on your FB page? Who does that? Anyone? Someone? If you're one of those people who have "in a relationship with Steve" written on your FB page, please come forward and explain why. (I first wrote "relationshit", now that's a Freudian slip if I ever saw one)

I can understand if you're married, or in a relationship that has been going on for the last 10 years by now, that maybe your status is something that you might want to stabilize also in the social media. You're not living a fling, a summer romance, or a hopeless relationship with a rocknroll star that actually only exists inside your own head, but a real rock solid "baby sorry I farted under the covers-that's ok dear" kind of a relationship. Maybe you also have kids, which would be one more good reason to claim your spouse also in the eyes of the public.THIS I get, this is ok, these are not the people I'm worried about.

But then there are those, who have been together with someone for 2 days and 15 hours exactly, and already their status has been changed from "single" to "in a relationship with Steve". These are the same people who have an actual date for when their relationship started, a.k.a they had this following conversation:

Girl: Baby, do you love me?
Steve: Sure, why not
Girl: Baby, do you want to be my boyfriend?
Steve: Sure, why not
Girl: Oh Steveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

These people can't let a relationship happen, they can't just "slip" into one, but instead they need to stabilize their position as soon as possible to avoid problems, and more importantly, to be able to change their status in FB. These are the same people who will be changing it back to "single" after 2 months, and crying their eyes out about it.

Love is/isn't/is/isn't in the air...

And this is my point exactly. I realize that it's all fun and games when you're starting a new relationship, and you can't wait for everyone to know. But you should also think about the fact that these days the probability of staying together forever is rather slim, and if you decide to change your status when you enter a relationship, then you must be ready to change it back when it ends. Do you really want to burden yourself with that? Think about it, the relationship ends, you're already feeling down, sad and suicidal, and on top of that you still need to change your FB status and see all the condolences and not-smiley-faces appear under your post. Just like you publicly rejoiced the start of the relationship, you have to publicly announce when it ends. You might even feel a little humiliated, as you're declaring "nope, it didn't work out this time either". Who wants that?? Not me.

"Bonnie is in a relationship with Clyde,
but it's complicated"

And then there are these people who put "it's complicated with Steve". Now WTF guys? Not only are you announcing that you're in a relationship, but that you're also having problems with it. Is that really something you want to share with people that you might not even know that well? (I'm referring to old schoolmates you haven't seen in 20 years or that one guy you once met at a disco and never saw again but who remained among your FB buddies). Come on, you can't be serious. Tell me it's a joke.



Then there are those who put down "in a relationship", but they don't want to specify with whom. I find that a bit odd. It's like you're happy to be in a relationship, but kind of embarrassed about who you're with. This might be convenient for those people who are always in a relationship, just with a different partner every few months/years. You know, those people who dump their boyfriend (or get dumped) and then five days later they're again in love with a new person. How do they do this, I have no idea, but good for them. Still, I think that if you're declaring your relationship online, either you go all the way with names and shit, or don't do it at all.

To avoid problems with previous or future boyfriends, I've decided not to declare my relationship status at all. Any changes that might or might not occur, remain in my own discretion. It's enough that all the photos of the once cute couple remain forevermore online. Call me cold, call me someone with no faith in love, call me sad and boring. You can call me what you want. I call myself Miss I Told You So (single, and it's complicated).